Sensitive Conversations

Secrets of Successful Conversations

Posted by on Dec 11, 2012 in Family Relationships, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

When we wish to talk with our aging parents or our adult children about difficult or sensitive topics, we have two things to manage: the task of the conversation…and the emotions that accompany it. Each party to the conversation has needs which the other can help them meet. Simply being heard is a huge need, but receiving support, understanding, and acceptance are also important.  For each family, the pressing topic(s) will be different. But before you talk about health issues, getting help around the house, downsizing, driving or any other concerns, take some time to prepare and...

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“Just in Case” Conversations

Posted by on Jun 26, 2012 in Planning, Safety Concerns, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

If your summer travel plans include a long-distance visit with aging parents, why not use the opportunity to do some “just in case” planning?  The relaxed pace of summer may offer a friendly environment in which to reflect and plan ahead. Also, being face-to-face may allow you to accomplish more than planning from a distance. Here are five tips for getting started, whether you are travelling across town or across the country!   1. Take note of warning signs that your parents may not be coping as well as before. Check for changes in these 4H’s: health, hygiene, housekeeping, and hazards...

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Parents Who Won’t Accept Help

Posted by on Feb 7, 2012 in Caregiving, Family Relationships, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

Originally published at www.thestar.com on September 3, 2010. Seniors resist help at home Susan Pigg, Living Reporter More than half of seniors resist asking for help, even from their adult children, fearing it signals a neediness that could land them in a nursing home, a new study shows. That fierce resistance is playing out in so many family squabbles — from the silent treatment to bitter turf wars between aging parents and their grown kids — that the home-care agency Home Instead Senior Care has just launched a series of online self-help videos, one of them focusing on communication....

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Holiday Visits with Aging Parents

Posted by on Sep 7, 2010 in Family Relationships, Power of Attorney, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

Holiday visits with aging parents can mean travel across town, across the country or out of the country. Sometimes, aging parents are well enough to visit us; more often, we are seeing them in their daily surroundings. These visits are great opportunities to plan together for the future, and to make note of your concerns about an aging parent’s well-being. In-person visits can also be the best times for a relaxed chat on important subjects … if conversations are approached with calm, care and respect. Here’s what to keep in mind as you prepare: 1. What are the topic(s)you...

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Sensitive Conversations

Posted by on Sep 7, 2010 in Family Relationships, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

Many of us have concerns about our parents’ health and well-being, or about their living arrangements. Our concern can lead to anxiety and frustration and we can be tempted to offer advice about “solutions” that seem obvious to us.  But our parents won’t welcome unsolicited advice any more than we did when they offered it to us. Successful conversations depend on two things: the kind of relationship you have with your parents and the nature of the conversation. If you have always been the “wonderful daughter”, you might be able to influence your...

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When Aging Parents Won’t Accept Help

Posted by on Sep 7, 2010 in Family Relationships, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

Even families who have good relationships with each other face challenges and uncertainty when the needs of aging parents change. One of the common issues is aging parents who appear to refuse help. It causes frustration in adult children and anxiety in the aging parent. An impasse can easily result. Several new dynamics emerge. You become aware of your own emotions – worry, sadness, anger. If you have siblings, you wonder what roles each of you will play to support each other and your parents. You may feel anxious because family relationships have been strained in the past.   Most...

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