Posts Tagged "conflict"

The “Not-So-Empty” Nest

Posted by on Feb 24, 2011 in Family Relationships | 0 comments

 Today, adult children are living with their boomer parents longer than previous generations did.  There are also “boomerang kids”, who return to the family home after some time on their own.  Why is this happening? How do you learn to manage with a household full of adults?   First, some statistics: In 1981, only 28% of Canadians aged 20 to 29 were living in the family home. By 2001, that figure was up to 41%. In the 1970’s, the median age at first marriage was 21 years for women and 23 for men. Now, it’s 26 for women and 28 for men. For many young adults, living...

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Help With Family Visits

Posted by on Dec 16, 2010 in Family Relationships | 0 comments

Some of us look forward to visiting our aging parents or our adult children – others not so much. We may live nearby, seeing each other often, but some of us make only occasional visits. For occasional visitors, it’s an opportunity see, hear, touch and sense what’s happening with our loved ones. The result can be joy and relief, or it can be growing concern and frustration. Visits can get weighed down with tradition and habits. Some of these are welcome, others leave us feeling that we have not progressed in our relationships or in dealing with matters important to the family. If you...

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Aging Parents and Sibling Rivalry

Posted by on Sep 7, 2010 in Family Relationships | 0 comments

When an aging parent is thrown into a crisis, siblings have the chance torally around each other and use their strengths to cope with the crisis in a way that serves everyone’s best interests. But old rivalry, competition and established role relationships and scripts can heighten conflict and crisis. How can brothers and sisters put aside these patterns when they are forced together to help their aging parents?  First, recognize and accept differences. You and your siblings do not necessarily share values, beliefs, and experiences; in fact, you may come from different generations! If...

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When Aging Parents Won’t Accept Help

Posted by on Sep 7, 2010 in Family Relationships, Sensitive Conversations | 0 comments

Even families who have good relationships with each other face challenges and uncertainty when the needs of aging parents change. One of the common issues is aging parents who appear to refuse help. It causes frustration in adult children and anxiety in the aging parent. An impasse can easily result. Several new dynamics emerge. You become aware of your own emotions – worry, sadness, anger. If you have siblings, you wonder what roles each of you will play to support each other and your parents. You may feel anxious because family relationships have been strained in the past.   Most...

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